Thursday 18 October 2012

Hindi Maloom Hei Kya?!?! ... Thoda Thoda maloom hei


P.S: THE HINDI SENTENCES USED BELOW ARE TRUE TO BEST OF GOOGLE TRANSLTOR’S KNOWLEDGE                                       

                                                As soon as I landed up in Bangalore in order to pursue my career with IT, I found shelter at my friend’s Paying Guest rooms. There were ten South Indian people in two rooms who are friends, friends of friends, mutual friend’s friend and yet-to-be friends. We all got acquainted taking a couple of days’ time mingling amongst ourselves. The day I turned to this place up fortunately or unfortunately turned out to be a Friday and so we had ample time to really gel amongst ourselves and learn almost everything about others. One serious topic of discussion was one’s expertise on Hindi. People were so eager enquiring each other so as to find how much of Hindi were made to Rest in Peace since birth and learnt that many had killed Hindi only up to their Sixth grade except a couple of people that included the great me and my friend Harsha who took Hindi to the next level in our lives attending private classes for the same and so we knew few of the repeatedly used Hindi words like “Teek hei”, “Bhayya”, “Dharwaaza”, “”Kalam”, “Bahuth”, “Koobsoorth” “Kuttha”, etc etc.,(So putting scene with these words)

                                                We were like the two one-eyed kings in the land of blinds. Full of pride, boasting and blowing our own trumpet happened the next few hours.

Me: “Kya Harsha, in logo ko hindi nahe aatha hei kya?!?!”

Harsha: “Kya karega macha? Chod dho”

                        Others saw us like the Oscar nominees. People were even ready to learn Hindi from both of us.  

                        The entire Saturday went discussing the same topic and few other topics that can never be jotted down here. The dusty rays from the sun on the Sunday afternoon woke all of us up around 12PM.  We took our own time to steady ourselves from bed, did whatever a human has to do on any mornings and started to a near-by restaurant by foot.

                        While on return back home, a middle aged man swiftly moved towards me and started asking me something in Hindi. He spoke very fast (like Rajdhani express) yet very clear because he is from North India. I am able to hear all his words, I am able to get all his expressions, I am able to react to all his words but was not able to sense what he is asking me since because I do not know Hindi as much as he knew it. He continued his simplex communication for about a minute and was anticipating my reply and while this happened my friends were keen to see so as how I handle this situation.

                        I blushed at people around took the man aside and told “Mujha Hindi thoda thoda hee aatha hei aur mujhe Hindi maloom nahe hei, BHAYYA”(used all possible words I knew in hindi in this same sentence). He stared at me for a minute but dint spit at me. But his face turned “KOLAVERI”. He gave me a “RANAGALAM” look.

                        Friends : “Dei, how did you manage the situation? You know that much Hindi really a??!?! Dei you are great da… Really da great…”

                        Me : “Mei hoon na…. Taare Zameen par… Zindagi na milegi dobara… Koyi bhaath nahe … aaavo hum jaavo”

                        Friends : “Dei you are fundamentally, basically, sincerely strong in Hindi da.. You are the master for us da… you will have to teach us Hindi da macha”

                        Me : “Teek hei teek hei, zarroooorrrrr… Aavo aavo… Mei Dhekthaaa hei”

The next day….
                                    I entered the office with much dreams as it was my first day into my corporate life. I went to the office professionally dressed, clean shaved and well-prepared. With smiles all over, I entered the lobby and found a group of people waiting for their enrolment into the company on the same day. I was asked to sit with the similar group of people who emerged as aliens a few minute back.

                                    I had a glimpse at all the faces that contributed the group. Everybody seemed like the “Vermas”, “Singhs”, “Aroras”, “Kapoors” and “Khans”.  I could not even find a “Shankar” or “Senthil” or “Murugan” or “Kumar”.

Gulp…….

                                    After a couple of hours passed by, we were made to introduce ourselves a bit louder that everybody gets at least your name and the place you come from(my guess was true). I was the last person and trust me I was the only person from the bottom-most India. In a group of 30, I found 27 from the Northern, Eastern and Western Parts of the Country and only three from South India out of which the other two does not know the language which I speak.

Gosch……..

            Tea Break:
                                                After the session got over, we broke for tea. I will jot down whatever I heard during the break..

“Hei kaisa lagtha hei thu?!?!?”,

“Bahuthu badiyaa hei hum aur thu?!?!”,

“Accha accha… aur kya?!?!”,

 “Kaa liya hei kya?!?!” (I wanted to write all those but “mujhe samaj mei nahe aa rahe hei”, because this is the maximum hindi I know :D :D”)

            Everybody asked me.
“naam?!?!”

“Kya bhaath hei?!?!”

“Kithnaa dhoor hei?!?!?”

“Kya kartha hei thu?!?!”

                        I dint want to reply back in Hindi because they will come to know that I do not know Hindi and so I kept mum. Everybody thought I was a silent boy who does not talk to others… he he he.. It is okay….

                        At one point in time everybody in my batch except my roomies came to know that I do not know Hindi and so I thought I can maintain this at least in front of my roomies that I had already given too much build up that I know lot of Hindi and if they come to know that I do not know Hindi they would spit on me.

                        But unfortunately there happened a situation which demanded an intro between my roomies and my batch mates. I did an intro as well. They were talking amongst themselves and at one point in time both the groups went mute… Because…

            Roomie: “Gokul is the only guy among the group who can talk really good hindi”

            Batch mate:”Gokul?!??! Really?!?!? I know you do not know Hindi, but I did no that you did not know this much Hindi… Have you atleast seen Hindi alphabets?!?! ”….. Spits…..

            Roomie: oh my goddddd……

My roomie came to me….

            Roomie: “Dei, he literally raped you with his words da that you do not know what really Hindi is…”

            Me: “Hm hm !??! Small boy.. Leave him da.. Let’s go

            Roomie: “No macha. I should get this clarifed da.. You come da…”

Roomie to Batch mate: “Hello boss. Talk to him in Hindi now.. Right in front of us… Come on

            Batch mate:”Sorry we have works

            Roomie: “Dei talk da.. I want to know if he knows Hindi are not


My batch mate started…

 “Kyā thum khud kē bārē mē sōch rahē hai?
Kyā āpa apanē kamarē kē sāthiyōṁ sē kahā hai?”

Blah.. blah…blah…..

            I was able to hear only his sound and was not able to recognise whatever he told me. Nothing, literally nothing…..

            Roomie: “Dei Gokul, reply da start….”

            Me: Gulp… Gulp… Gulp….” Macha he is speaking Kashmir hindi da.. I know only Mumbai hindi da macha….”

            Roomie: “Dei call that Mumbai wala” and he went on for another couple of minutes in Hindi

            Me: I blinked like a ginger ate monkey…. “Macha he speaks Andheri hindi da… I know only Dhadhar Hindi da…. So this is out of scope

My roomies surrounded me and hit me like anything for all these scenes I put. I was bed-ridden for two days. Full rest.. Complete rest…
Till date I know only two flawless sentences in Hindi….

            “Thumhaara naam kya hei”, “Mera naam Gokul hei

MANY WILL SAY THIS IS YOUR RAASHTRA BAASHA SO YOU SHOULD LEARN.. ARENT YOU ASHAMED OF IT AND ALL THAT… FOR ALL OF THEM I WOULD LOVE TO TELL YOU THAT I AM LEARNING HINDI AND MY NEXT POST WILL BE IN HINDI….

            Mar gaya hei kya?!?!?!? :P :P :P

           
                        

Tuesday 2 October 2012

Movie Review - Thaandavam

                                               
                                                        It was the Saturday night when I with seven other friends of mine had a brief walk on foot to the near-by multiplex to check out the latest flick of one of the most prominent and talented south Indian cine star “Vikram”. Bearing the name “Thaandavam”, it was very evident that this would be one among many Tamil movies where Revenge would take the center stage. Sathish fetched us the tickets standing in quite a longer queue and we decided to walk into the respective screen as soon as we got the tickets in our hand. We literally ran into screen without being able to hide the expectations for this much expected south Indian flick. We were the first groups to enter the screen and we got settled on the seats comfortably. The movie certificate flashed the screens right away without giving the news reels and the advertisements a chance.  
                                                As soon as the certificate hit the screen, the crowd went berserk and started shouting their favorite star’s name. The title block paved way for the sub-sequent scenes which portrayed a bird’s eye view of London. The movie started with elaborating serial bomb blasts across the cross sections of London. As soon as this frame comes to an end, the director takes us a year back to let us know what exactly happened. Subsequently, Santhanam makes his presence as a local taxi driver and tries to convince the audience with his poor possible jokes. Santhanam meets Vikram during one of his return trips and offers him a place inside the car where the first murder by Vickram comes into picture in a classic style which goes on to four or five murders as time goes by. As time goes by we learn that Vickram is named “Kenny” in the movie, a bomb blast victim who lost his eyes and works in a church as a piano player. Moments later, gorgeous Amy occupies the screen with a peppy number where she does only the walking and not the dancing. Amy looked amazingly cute with any kind of attire she was in with.
                                                The movie rolls on to show that Amy falls in love with Kenny and later at one point in time discovers what really had happened to Kenny. The “Kenny” in the movie was originally called the “Shiva Kumar”, an IPS officer who lives by his values. He is forcefully made to marry Anushka, an eye doctor and later falls in love with her. Vikram and Jagapathi babu are being portrayed as two close friends who value relationship more than anything else. Vikram is being sent to London off for a mission to stop a deadly weapon disseminating across the globe which can turn disastrously dangerous and that is where he comes to know that even his kith and kin had betrayed him. Jagapathi babu turns Vikram’s foe. Vikram tries his possible luck to ensure things do not go out of control but fails miserably as series of bomb blasts across London due to this weapon. The sad part is that Anushka loses her life in the blast and Vikram loses his vision. The tail end of the movie revolves around the incidents that bought Lakshmi Rai and company into the picture and how Vikram takes a revenge on his kin.
                                                The running time of the movie would have easily exceeded two hour and forty minutes which has been very recently trimmed. The director made an exquisite use of Vikram for narrating such a good story with full twists and twirls. Vikram’s performance was flawless. He had done an excellent job as a blind personality and his efforts are very evident in the movie as it grows onto you. Vikram underwent special classes for “Echo-Location” so as to sound natural in the character he plays which deserves a special laud. Vikram’s costumes are apt. At this juncture, I would like to applaud Vikram for the kind of physique he bore for this movie. I would rate Vikram an 8.5 on a scale of ten for such a formidable performance in the movie.
                                                Amy Jackson comes into picture very often. She comes as a model who tries to make Vikram fall for her. I felt Amy has got no bigger role to play other than looking beautiful in the movie which she naturally is and so she would score a decent mark in the movie. Anushka who marks her presence a bit late after the movie started, scores full marks for her performance. She looks so cute and she makes the audience raise their brows for her. She looked awesome in the movie and does a commanding performance in acting as well.
                                                Music is not worth a mention. Only a couple of songs seemed catchy saw many go out of the screens for a smoke during the songs. The background score was reasonably good. G.V. Prakash can do a lot and this is not is what is being expected out of him as he is so good at ripping few from western music. The camera is amazingly good. It has portrayed the beauty of London in more than ways possible. Comedy did not work a lot out. I felt comedy track was too disjoint from the main track and is forced at very many places. They have literally dumped the comedy sequences into the script wherever that luxury is never a necessity.
                                                The casting seemed perfect for the movie and everybody lived up to the expectations. The movie had very many actors who can take the movie to the next level of which some include Vikram, anushka, amy, jagapathi babu, saranya, santhanam, etc. Costumes were neatly designed and crafted.
                                                The first half of the movie was quite dragging and the second half of the movie was a racy entertainer but nevertheless an unfruitful attempt. I would say A.L.Vijay’s career growth is elevating to greater heights with such kind of a sincere and earnest attempt. I would always say that this is one kind of a movie and should not be missed by any of those due to inappropriate critics. Priorities and preferences differ from person to person and so you can always check this movie out in theaters before you spread a word about this movie. Personally asking I would always suggest you this movie with no hesitation.

VERDICT: One kind of a movie with lots of twists and twirls and is worth a watch. Recommended.